Category Archives: paperthin hymns

Why I can’t sing the song “Lord I give you my heart” anymore.

I was at Church a few weeks ago and the song “Lord I give you my heart” was queued up and was sung by the congregation. Up to this point I had been worshiping and my mind was fairly centered on the adoration of Jesus, but this song caused my mind to become disengaged and spiritually….disentangled. It was an awful, profoundly disturbing feeling.

Because here’s the thing- I like to sing worship songs in Church which allow me to tell the truth. That is, when I am communicating by singing to the Lord, I do not like it when I am put in the position of having to lie or exaggerate my soundness of faith, my motives, my intentions, or my devotion to Christ.  I do not like it when I have to sing promises and declarations to Christ which exceed my promise to fulfill, as that leaves me feeling like a liar- a cause for immediate disconnect from the song itself. It is one of those things that I’m mindful of and sensitive to. I like worship music with theological lyrics. I like psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with words that tell of deep Biblical truths about God. I don’t like singing falsehoods about who I am, what I do, and what my heart’s inclination is to Christ.

In short, I don’t like singing things I don’t mean. When I sing these songs which are about me, I become painfully aware that  I’m declaring things that I can’t and don’t back up, or which my heart is not convinced that it is able to do. I’m also aware that I am singing things contrary to my own nature, and that I’m singing words which confess that I am doing and am willing to do things that I am not able or willing to do. For example, any songs that have the lyrics “I will always love you. I will always worship you. You’re all I want. You’re all I ever needed.  You’ll always be my all. I will always follow you. I’ll never want anyone but you.

I would not say that these are bad songs, or that the writers have ill intent. Rather though, when I consider these in a theological context they strike me as impossible promises for me to fulfill.  To do these I would have to be fulfilling the works of the law perfectly, which seemed to me as a wretched proposition. Because I don’t always love Christ. And I won’t always worship him. And he won’t always be all I want. And he won’t always be all I need. And I won’t always follow him. So why am I singing that I do and will? Case in point-

Lord I Give You My Heart

This is my desire, to honour You
Lord with all my heart I worship You
all I have within me
I give You praise
all that I adore is in You
Lord I give You my heart
I give You my soul
I live for You alone
Every breath that I take
Every moment I’m awake
Lord have Your way in me

My desire to honor God does exist, as a new creation in Christ, so I’m fine with that, but the next line is problematic. I don’t worship the Lord with all my heart. Does anybody? I wasn’t worshiping him with all my heart that morning. Nor was I the week before. How about the next two lines? The third line is a bit wonky, as I’m not really sure what it means or how it connects with everything else, but that last line is also troublesome. I adore so many things that aren’t Jesus! I make idols out of sports teams, my family, my intellect., and I give adoration to things that rob Christ of glory rather than give him it. I raze the storehouses of this world for pleasure and peace- turning my affections towards inconsequential trivialities  instead of on my great God and savior. That does not strike me as the actions of a man who can say with honesty and with a straight face “All that I adore is in you”...

Line three of the chorus. “I live for you alone?” I don’t live for God alone. No one does. I can’t sing that with a straight face. I’m not sure how anybody else can. See- God knows our hearts and he knows the extent that we are “living for him”, so why am I declaring to my brothers and sisters that I’m living for him alone when I know that’s simply not true. I feel gross and deceptive when I sing that.  And assuming lines 4 and 5 are connected to line three- that is to say that with every breath that I take and every moment that I’m awake I’m living for God alone, that would be another false statement that I cannot bear to sing forth.

Am I alone in this? Am I the only one who is bothered by that? I’m not trying to nitpick, but rather to make a point that many of our worship sessions are loaded with songs that declare works, deeds, and intents  that our congregants have no intention of ever doing, or are simply by virtue of the nature of their will are unable to do. I don’t know if it makes sense that we’re singing the songs with the presuppositions that we’re only speaking of our best intentions, or in the present tense and not the future tenses. For some of the songs we sing I suppose it makes sense to look at them in the big picture, such as I generally love Jesus even if I don’t specifically do all the time, but that isn’t always the most helpful perspective.

I think this is why I prefer to sing songs that are Christ-centered, because I know that he is able to do them and has done all these things. This is opposed to  songs that are man-centered, because I know I have not done these things. With Christ-centered and Christ-focused songs, I have complete confidence in his ability to do as he says, and to keep his word and fulfill his promises. In this, I can sing those types of lyrics because I have a clean conscience when I do so. I don’t have to embellish or exaggerate my ability to complete and be faithful to the things that I am singing,  but rather I can breathe easily and rest in the grace that where my words and works fail, Jesus’ never do.

What do you guys think? Do you have any problem singing sons with lyrics like “I will always love you. I will always worship you. You’re all I want. You’re all I ever needed.  You’ll always be my all. I will always follow you. I’ll never want anyone but you.”? If not, how to you reconcile that with the reality and truth of the situation- which is that, quite frankly, you don’t?

What other songs do you have trouble singing, for similar-ish reasons?

*Note. The aforementioned post is a deconstruction and reconstruction of something I wrote last year, but with present day application.


Almost [saved] Poet Ezekial Azonwu

This is a phenomenal video by the people over at P4CM. Poert Ezekial Azonwu is simply electric and the gospel-centeredness is majestic. I would strongly recommend that everyone watches the whole thing through. And yes- I would give anything to be there. The next Poets lounge is going down October 29, 2011. See http://p4cm.com for more details. Highly Recommended!


Paperthin Hymn. Christ is Risen. Matt Maher

Christ is Risen

Let no one caught in sin remain
Inside the lie of inward shame
But fix our eyes upon the cross
And run to Him who showed great love
And bled for us
Freely You’ve bled for us

Christ is risen from the dead
Trampling over death by death
Come awake, Come awake
Come and rise up from the grave
Christ is risen from the dead
We are one with him again
Come awake, Come awake
Come and rise up from the grave

Beneath the weight of all our sin
You bowed to none but heaven’s wil
No Scheme of hell, no scoffer’s crown
No burden great can hold you down
In strength you reign
Forever let your church proclaim

O death, where is your sting?
O hell, where is your victory?
O church, come stand in the light
The glory of God has defeated the night

O death, where is your sting?
O hell, where is your victory?
O church, come stand in the light
Our God is not dead
He’s alive! He’s alive!

REFLECTIONS

What a great song! I had never head of it  until we sung it at the Fellowship Baptist Church this past Sunday, and I was immediately struck by a certain portion of the lyrics.

Christ is risen from the dead

Trampling over death by death

Come awake, Come awake

Come and rise up from the grave

That is a unique phraseology that is familiar to me, as I remember reading about it in a commentary on John Chrystosom’s famous Pashal homily of the early 5th century. It is taken from a line from the Pashal troparion [ie, an ancient Easter hymn that very short and typically chanted] which is well known in most Byzantine and Eastern Orthodox Church traditions, the sum of which is

Christ is risen from the dead,

Trampling down death by death,

And upon those in the tombs

Bestowing life!”

Not just that, but I thought I heard that phrase a bit earlier than the 5th century in some obscure setting. I checked my library, and I found it. There was a man in the late 2nd century named Theodotus the Shoemaker, who was an early Christian writer from Byzantium. Though denounced as a heretic by one of the early Popes, [with good reason, I would argue]  he too used the phrase “death by death” in referring to baptism in some of his gnostic/Valentinian writings.

So while I love that lyric, I’m also somewhat aware that it is not so much the act of death that conquered death, as it was Jesus rising from the death. Seeing as how that statement is linked in the first line, its fair to make the latter statement without being theologically imprecise. All in all though a very good song, and one I heartily enjoy and recommend. Oh, and the last part is clearly a riff on 1 Corinthians 15.

But when this perishable will have put on the imperishable, and this mortal will have put on immortality, then will come about the saying that is written, “DEATH IS SWALLOWED UP in victory.  O DEATH, WHERE IS YOUR VICTORY? O DEATH, WHERE IS YOUR STING?”  The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law;  but thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. 1 Corinthians 54-57.


How worship music destroyed me. From bitterness to blessing

I remember going off to youth events such as YC, Richter, Revolution, Re;vive, and worshiping for hours to what I had considered back then phenomenal worship music. It was loud, it was catchy, it was about my love for Jesus, and some songs would last over half an hour. Rhythmic. Pulsating. They would build and build and then when we could not bear it any longer- when the weight of our tears and composure were straining at the seams, it would come crashing down in a crescendo of key changes and pure white hot bliss.

In the aftermath I would feel warm and spiritually buzzed. I felt drained, spent, and yet so very, very happy. In those moments I felt close to God, and when people said “The spirit really showed up” I couldn’t help but echo that statement, as I knew exactly what they meant. I remember being a teen and later a young adult in a church which had a very talented worship team, and while perhaps not to the same degree as the big conferences, they were usually able to match the intensity and whip me and my friends up into a frenzy. More often than not all they needed was the right Hillsong song and we were good to go.

But those moments of being buzzed and feeling close to God did not last too long. We would have youth on Friday and I was high all night. That feeling would wane a little on Saturday, got a small uptick on Sunday, sag on Monday, and then by Tuesday it had all but dissipated. I did not feel close to God. I did not feel spiritual. Half the time I didn’t even feel like a Christian. I found myself longing for that spiritual high that I felt.  Instead of basking in it I found myself chasing it. Needing it. Coveting it.  I found myself counting the hours until Friday would come, so that I could worship and get back those feelings that I had lost. On Friday I was loved by God and I knew he was happy with me- on Monday I was depressed and sensed his disapproval. On Friday he was pleased with me- on Monday his disappointment was tangible.  Because after all, if God and I were tight then I wouldn’t be feeling so disconnected from him, but would feel the same way I did during worship. This was, upon much reflection, a very strange time.

Yet in the years since then I have learned some valuable lessons. Chief among them is the realization than an emotional high is no substitute for true spirituality. No one tells Church-kids that, but its true. I’ve learned that absent knowledge, even the worship of Christ can be used as a weapon against me by the enemy. That when we treat the worship high like heroin in an addicts hands, people are going to get hurt. I’ve learned that oftentimes worship music can be little more than manipulation, and is used that way to varying degrees consciously or unconsciously. I’ve learned that most variations of the expression “the holy spirit really showed up” in particularly intense worship session is a Christological joke and is theological poison. I’ve learned that a kid can attend youth group, spend two hours in heaving sobs while on her knees with hands raised, and not once have tasted anything close to a true, legitimate encounter with the Holy Spirit. I’ve learned those experiences can mess her up, and that same kid can, after youth is over, turn around and smoke a joint and have sex with her boyfriend, the last two hours seemingly forgotten. I’ve learned that the point of worship can be not to teach doctrine and to deepen our knowledge of God, but rather to recite silly and shallow lyrics about nothing.

I’ve learned that chasing the emotional high can crush a soul. That it makes people think such experiences are normative for the Christian life, and when they fail to experience it consistently, grow bitter and disillusioned. That it can foster depression and angst and whets the sharpening stone for the knife that slaughters the sheep. That instead of developing depth it breeds shallowness, immaturity, and confusion. I’ve learned that worship can become the biggest draw for the church, and that worship nights will steamroll over bible studies and adult Sunday school. That a church oftentimes will pour much more resources, energy, thought and time into making a killer worship service than they will into developing deep, thoughtful, meaty, mature, theologically precise and provoking bible studies.

I’ve learned that parents and pastors will send their children away to youth group and conferences without ensuring that they have solid teaching on what worship is, how it functions, and how it relates to the gospel and god’s pleasure with you. There are no warnings of “Don’t mistake the spiritual high for biblical sanctification. Its not real! Ibut rather will tacitly endorse that sort of confusion. They’ll let the seedy underbelly of mainstream evangelical goofiness swallow up their kids and spit up out the bones, and they they’ll wonder why their sons and daughters left the church after highschool.

I’ve learned that there are tons of people out there like me who have been burned by this sort of thing- who have been beat up and are fellow bruised reeds- victims of men and women with good intentions and  no discernment who thought they were doing us a favor, who should have known better.

Lastly, I’ve learned that worship is beautiful and that giving praise to Christ is satisfying. That giving him glory is right. That honoring him is freeing and rejoicing with him is like a warm blanket to the soul.  That communicating with our Savior though this medium is a wonderful and powerful thing. That when we worship in spirit and in truth we will grow through it. In the years since then I’ve been blessed to understand that the emotions and feelings that can be associated with worship are no substitute for the actual work of the Holy Spirit in our life, even as those feelings and emotions can be a very important part of it.

Most importantly, I’ve learned  that God’s pleasure in me is not predicated upon my moral behavior or in some hype and emotional subtext I feel, but rather on the cross of Christ, which is the kindness of God that leads me to repentance.


Paperthin Hymn; Sanctus

Sanctus [Holy Lord God]


Holy, holy, holy Lord. God of power and might.
Heaven and earth are full of your glory.
Hosanna in the highest.

Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord.
Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord.
Hosanna in the highest. Hosanna in the highest.

 

Reflections

The Sanctus is the last part of the preface in the Mass. It is designed to be sung by the celebrant and the people and in my estimation is an exquisitely joyful time. When we attended St. Thomas Anglican for a time, they had a slightly quirky version of this which always put a smile on my face.

It is thousands of years old. Clement of Rome d. about 104) mentions the sanctus. He quotes the text in Isaiah 6:3 and goes on to say that it is also sung in church “for the Scripture says . . . Holy, holy, holy Lord of hosts; full is every creature of his glory. And we, led by conscience,  gathered together in one place in concord, cry to him continuously as from one mouth, that we may become sharers in his great and glorious promises.” The second part of the text beginning with the word “Blessed”), is taken from Matthew 21:9, which dexscribes Jesus’ Palm Sunday entry into Jerusalem.

The Sanctus, apart from merely being mentioned by Clement, is later spoken of by Origen, St Cyril, Athanasius, John Chrystosom, and other Church fathers. I think much of the beauty of it is because the nature of it seems to be  a never ending hymn sung by angels, archangels, saints and all creation in worship of God. It is pure unbridled adoration.

This particualr version is sung by Tara Ward from the CD “Hope for a tree cut down” As always I don’t endorse this church or all the songs on their CD, but this truly is a phenomenal rendering.

 

 


Worship from the Alliance Church

I was listening to the July 3rd sermon at the Fort McMurray Alliance Church, and right at the end they included the song “Beautiful Savior”.  It is a simple and beautiful song with phenomenal lyrics. I believe it is sung by Lucas Welsh, and I was deeply and personally blessed by listening to it and worshiping with it.


Your nail-scarred hands are beautiful.
Your nail-scarred feet are beautiful.
And by Your wounds, my wounds are healed.
Your crown of thorns is beautiful.
Your cross of scorn is beautiful.
For by Your wounds, our wounds are healed.

Beautiful Savior. Jesus, we believe.
Despised and rejected. Jesus, we receive You.

Scourged for our atonement. You endured it all.
For the glory of the Father.
We were among the ones You saw?

I hope to be able to include  more worships songs from different local area churches in the future, and this is a great one to start it off.


Paperthin hymn: You Have Been Raised

 

You Have Been Raised


Verse1
How do we know we’ve been forgiven?
How do we know that we have been made clean?
How do we know we’ll go to heaven?
How do we know we’ve been redeemed?

Chorus
You have been raised, the tomb has been opened
Nothing can take away our hope in You
You have been raised
You have been raised, the work is completed
Hell and its powers have been defeated
You have been raised

Verse 2
Now we are free from condemnation
There is no judgment left for us to fear
We don’t have to wonder if we’re welcome
You are the One who’s brought us near

Bridge
The price You paid for us
Has fully been accepted
Because of Your shed blood
We cannot be rejected

REFLECTIONS

“You have been raised” is one of my favorite songs from the new Sovereign Grace album “Risen”, released just a few months ago. [Click link to listen and purchase] The music is by Mark Altrogge, Bob Kauflin, and Ken Boer; and the lyrics are by Mark Altrogge and Bob Kauflin. The album itself is a concept album, whereby

“He is not here, for he has risen, as he said.”  These words, spoken by an angel to the women at Jesus’s tomb, changed history forever. Christ’s resurrection was more than a display of raw supernatural power. It was the single event that assures us that his payment for our sins has been accepted. God’s wrath is satisfied. Death is defeated. The powers of darkness are overcome. Sin’s dominion has been broken. And the life of the age to come has dawned.  The songs on this album celebrate these realities, experienced and enjoyed by all who place their faith and hope in Jesus Christ.

I’m not sure I can say it better than that. I’ve said before in other posts that our praise and worship music is a sermon; that it’s purpose is to teach us about Christ and his word.This song does exactly that. At the same time praise and worship is also a form of prayer. There is a little known Latin phrase whereby “lex orandi, lex credendi” -As we pray, so we believe. That strikes me as a very apt term, and a wonderful way to express what we’re listening to and singing. The more we sing this, [ie, confess this] the more it will shape and reinforce our beliefs.

As it were, this is a perfect song to demonstrate the sheer “singability” of a song that would rival almost any hymn for theological and biblical depth. There are many great hymns which have beautiful lyrics, but have a very jarring composition. This is not one of them.It is hard to listen to this song without standing up and cheering while you sing.

*

bonus: YouTube video w/choir


Album Download: The Village Church

The Village Church has released their first professional full-length album, which is a collection of original music that they sing and play at their services. The music is top-notch, and has been featured a few times in the paperthin hymn section of this blog. I really cannot recommend it strongly enough. You can get more information here.


O Sacred Head, Now Wounded

O Sacred Head, Now Wounded



O sacred head, now wounded, with grief and shame weighed down
Now scornfully surrounded, with thorns Thine only crown
How pale Thou art with anguish, with sore abuse and scorn
How does that visage languish, which once was bright as morn

What Thou, my Lord, has suffered was all for sinners gain
Mine, mine was the transgression, but Thine the deadly pain
Lo, here I fall my Savior, this I deserve Thy place
Look on me with Thy favor, assist me with Thy grace

What language shall I borrow to thank Thee dearest friend
For this, Thy dying sorrow thy pity without end
Oh make me Thine forever, and should I fainting be
Lord, let me never, never out live my love to Thee
Lord, let me never, never out live my love to Thee

REFLECTIONS

Originally from a Latin poem “Salve mundi salutare” and attributed to  Arnulf von Loewen  [1146–1240], “O Sacred Head” is one of seven sections to be used for meditation during Holy Week. Each section focuses on one aspect of Christ’s dying body. Paul Gerhardt translated the seventh section “Salve caput cruentaturn”, which addresses Christ’s head, into German  in 1656. The hymn was first translated into English in 1752 by John Gambold [1711-1771], an Anglican vicar.  His translation begins, “O Head so full of bruises.” In 1830 a new translation of the hymn was made by an American Presbyterian minister James W. Alexander [ 1804-1859]. Alexander’s translation, beginning “O sacred head, now wounded,”

As it were, I love this hymn for its ancient history as well as the language, which is deeply devotional in nature. The text makes a very personal application of Christ’s atoning death  and confesses our gratitude and commitment to Christ. Wonderfully theological and precise, I love the line “Mine, mine was the transgression, but Thine the deadly pain”. There is a weight and gravitas that is self evident and which self-exists as part of the lyrical makeup, and while this song and songs of similar caliber have all but vanished from the modern evangelical praise and worship landscape, I look forward to the day when they are brought back.

In the case of this particular version of the hymn, it was sung by Serri Youngward on her Sons and Daughters CD, which can be found here

 

 


The Oxyrhynchus Hymn

The following is taken from a manuscript fragment known as Parchment Oxyrhyncus 15.1786 [or more commonly as POxy 1786]. It was found on a papyri fragment in an ancient garbage dump in Egypt in 1918  and dates from the late 3rd century. It is significant for two reasons:

  1. It is the latest in date of the extant compositions using ancient Greek music notation and thus marks the end of that era.
  2. It is the earliest extant example of Christian hymnody. There are a few other hymns that are arguably older, including “Hail, Gladdening Light” and some passages of the New Testament [though there's some disagreement there if they are hymns or merely poetic flights]

The Oxyrhynchus Hymn



“(Spoken) [Σε Πάτερ κόσμων, Πάτερ αἰώνων, μέλπωμεν] ὁμοῦ, πᾶσαι τε Θεοῦ λόγιμοι δο[ῦλο]ι. Ὅσα κ[όσμος ἔχει πρὸς ἐπουρανίων ἁγίων σελάων.]
(Sung) [Πρ]υτανήω σιγάτω, μηδ’ ἄστρα φαεσφόρα λ[αμπέ]
(Spoken) σθων, [ἀπ]ολει[όντων] ῥ[ιπαὶ πνοιῶν, πηγαὶ]
(Sung) ποταμῶν ῥοθίων πᾶσαι. Υμνούντων δ’ ἡμῶν [Π]ατέρα χ’ Υἱὸν χ’ Ἅγιον Πνεῦμα, πᾶσαι δυνάμεις ἐπιφωνούντων· Ἀμήν, Ἀμήν. Κράτος, αἶνος [ἀεὶ καὶ δόξα Θεοὶ δωτῆρι μόνῳ πάντων] ἀγαθῶν· Ἀμήν, Ἀμήν.”

. . . Let it be silent,

Let the luminous stars not shine,

let the winds and all the noisy rivers die down;

and as we hymn the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit,

let all the powers add ‘Amen, amen.’

Empire, praise always, and glory to God,

the sole giver of all good things.

Amen, amen.


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